Every few months I latch onto some Top 40 song that I become obsessed with even though it isn’t at all relevant to my current life.
I haven’t gone through a break-up in about a decade, but I’m living for Ariana Grande’s “thank u, next.” Its a song about self-love and being thankful for the lessons learned through failed relationships. Even though the words don’t apply, as I say goodbye to 2018, I do it with a “thank u, next” sentiment.
I broke up with a few things this year, and I’m better after going through it. My life is much improved now that I’m saying goodbye to these five things.
1. Goodbye stressing over things I can’t control.
It is my favorite thing to do. I love waking up at 3 a.m. to overanalyze EVERY conversation I have ever had in my entire life.
I started last year by making a list of things that were stressing me out, then I circled the things I can actually control. I’m sure it will come as no surprise that most of the things on that list involve other people’s actions/attitudes, and I can only control my own.
Breaking up with that unnecessary stress created a much improved 2018, so I’m reminding myself to do that again when I feel like I’m sinking.
2. See you later longer commutes.
I really thought I had a healthy work/life balance, but mid-year, we moved my little to a new preschool, five minutes from home. I said goodbye to an hour long commute and my life improved drastically. I had no idea how terrible I was making my days by not making that one small change. Thank you; next time we will remember this lesson if we move or change jobs or schools!
3. Bye-bye Starbucks and other money sucking apps.
I’m trying to say thank you, next to some of my debt, so I removed all the apps that help me spend money too easily from my phone. I shop out of boredom and not need, and let’s be honest, I’ll be paying off student loans until I die, so do I really need a $5 latte every day? Or the calories? Prob not.
4. Hasta la vista letting relationship problems get the best of me.
My husband and I reached a point this year when we almost said “NEXT!” to our marriage. I don’t say this flippantly; it was a challenging year. I’m sharing because instead of getting rid of each other, we used the challenges to learn how to be grateful for each other now. We’re still working, and I’m so grateful that we reached a breaking point because it forced us to remember why we love each other. Oversharing. Sorry, honey. Just wait until the blog post that really gets into this 🙂
5. Kicking to the curb trying to handle it all on my own.
This year, I learned to ask for help. Idk why we, me, thought I had to do it all on my own, or why asking for help felt like admitting a weakness.
Asking for help, guidance, advice, or for a partner at work or at home does not make you weak. It means you’re self-aware enough to know you want or need to learn and that there are people around you that can teach, support, and yes, help, you. This was a tough breakup, but I’m grateful to know that I can ask for help from my family, friends, colleagues, therapist, whatever, and they’ll give it freely.
So, thank you, 2018 for all you taught me. You’re an angel, I’m thankful, but I’m moving on. It’s not me, it’s you. I’m actually pretty ok, and in 2019, I’m going to try to be even better.
Thank u, next.